Your Video Store Shelf - Direct-to-Video DVD Reviews, Top movies, Movie trailers, Articles, News,YVSS

Ghost Watcher 2

K-Pax — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 23:39:24 +0000

Ghost Watcher 2
Director(s): David A. Cross (Ghost Watcher)
Writer(s): David A. Cross (Ghost Watcher)
Starring: Jillian Byrnes

What impresses me most about director/writer David A. Cross is that Lions Gate distributed his first effort, Ghost Watcher, at the end of October 2004. A year later, in the same month of 2005, Ghost Watcher II was released. And not only were both Ghost Watcher films quite good, but he managed to improve upon the first despite still working with a miniscule budget.

Returning from the first Ghost Watcher is the formerly agoraphobic Laura Kove (Byrnes), who barely survived her first ordeal with a ghost in the first entry. In this one she’s helping Tracy Cain, who was responsible for her mother’s death when she crashed her car shortly after getting her license. She was stabbed by a madman right after, but managed to survive. Three months later Tracy is still feelings the mental effects of that night. Not only is she hearing voices, but she’s also getting split-second visions of some sort of terrible accident. Laura gets called in after a ghost seemingly invades Tracy’s home, and from there the characters work towards deconstructing Tracy’s visions.

Like the first Ghost Watcher, Ghost Watcher II still fails to really hit what should be emotional high notes. It’s partially because of the low budget nature of the production, although some blame can be laid on the actresses. I’m hearing praise for Jillian Byrnes all over the place, but I just don’t buy it.

Regardless of that, Ghost Watcher II is still one hell of a movie. It’s actually quite suspenseful, and untangles the web that is Tracy Cain’s life in a way that leaves you teetering until the final scene. I haven’t watched a movie for a second time since Hell’s Gate: 11:11, so that should serve as quite the endorsement for it.

Bring on Ghost Watcher III for October of 2006 David.
DVD: A gag reel and some cast and crew interviews that leads to the greatest extra of them all; The Last Halloween Part 2.

I have no idea if it’s Ghostwatcher II or Ghost Watcher II, but I chose to use the later because it doesn’t look right as a compound word.

Ghetto Dawg 2

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 18:17:19 +0000

Ghetto Dawg 2
Release Date: 2005 (USA)
Genre: Drama
Director(s): Jeff Crook & Josh Crook (both of Sucker Punch)
Writer(s): Christine Conradt (A Killer Upstairs, The Perfect Nanny)
Staring: Will Sierra, Paris Campbell, Kelvin Coffey

Unfortunately, I remember nothing about the original Ghetto Dawg. I know that I saw it, but at this point I don’t even remember if I enjoyed it, let alone what the plot was. It must have performed quite nicely for Spartan Home Entertainment, as four years later Integration Entertainment chose Ghetto Dawg 2 to be their first in-house production. And despite the producers working with a budget that was likely $100,000 or lower, Ghetto Dawg 2 is a fantastic piece of work. Brian Averill, who directed the original Ghetto Dawg, went onto work with a higher budget for the excellent Simple Revenge. And if there’s any justice in the world, Jeff and Josh Crook, who previously helmed the acclaimed low(er) budget Sucker Punch, will move on up as well.

I knew there had to be something to Ghetto Dawg 2 for it to warrant distribution through Lionsgate. Sure, nearly everything Integration licenses gets put out by LG, but a company that rarely touches urban material suddenly distributing the sequel to freakin Ghetto Dawg seemed out of place. Just as you all probably thought when you saw it at the video store, I figured Ghetto Dawg 2 would be cheap, exploitative, poorly directed, and full of actors who can’t act.

Color me surprised. Ghetto Dawg 2 is one of the best made-for-video urban films that I’ve ever seen. After years of sitting through Maverick, York, and Spartan’s lukewarm offerings, someone finally stepped up and made something great.

What’s mildly amusing, at least to me, is that Ghetto Dawg 2’s plot is quite similar to that of Two Guns. Both deal with the pain and yearning for revenge that one goes through when a family member is murdered. But while Two Guns was awful and couldn’t have been saved by a million dollar budget, Ghetto Dawg 2 is breathtaking, gritty, and most importantly, real.

Inner city youth Donte is conflicted when Angel, who runs the dog fighting division of crime boss Big Daddy’s empire, murders his brother Tyrone. The only thing Donte is left with is his brother’s prized pitbull. Even though it seems so easy, when he’s presented with the opportunity he just can’t muster up the strength to pull the trigger and end the life of the man who killed his brother. Donte believes that being an assistant to the cold-blooded and ruthless hitman Jojo will prepare him for the big moment. But as he starts up a relationship with Angel’s girlfriend Brynn between going out on the town and witnessing Jojo brutally murdering at Angel’s behest, he realizes that he’s just not up to it. But that doesn’t mean he and Brynn can’t hatch a plan whereby Angel will be taken out without Donte pulling the trigger.

The Cooks are such talented directors that I refuse to believe they’ll be doing this kind of fare five years from now. Unlike someone like Anthony Hickox, whose style I do admire and enjoy, the Crooks are capable of being flashy without causing distraction. Not only that, but they picked out an excellent cinematographer, and the editing style focuses on realism rather than dramatics. Ghetto Dawg 2’s performances require no showy editing for the film to connect with you.

Great stuff.
DVD: Barebones.

Gettin’ Da Munchies

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 18:12:29 +0000

Gettin’ Da Munchies
Release Date: 12 July 2005 (USA)
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Brian Shackelford
Writer(s): Brian Shackelford
Starring: Jai Norman, Darryl Crayon, Monroe Brooks

An unemployed fellow holds a video game tournament at his house where much weed smoking and talk about sexual positions goes on. Naturally they get hungry, sending the participants on a series of crazy adventures that leave them buck-naked, scared, and horny.

Gettin’ Da Munchies is, at the very least, not nearly as bad as past urban comedies. Ski Trippin’ and Diggin’ For Dollars could only hope to be as good as Gettin’ Da Munchies, which says something about how bad those two movies are. Because no matter how much better Munchies is then its genre counterparts, it’s still a bad movie that just isn’t very funny at all.

The production values on Getting’ Da Munchies are slightly above average for urban comedies, more or less putting it on level of a Junie Smith production. That means, in short, it’s not incompetent, but it’s far from competent. The only fallacy that Munchies really makes is the editors weird decision to fill chase scenes with what appear to be gunshots. This is the despite the fact that no one ever really brandishes a gun throughout the whole movie.

Director Brian Shackelford felt that a guest start was needed in the movie, and thus decided to search through the world of porn for that special someone. Instead of the natural choice of anyone with a set of breasts, Shackelford instead delivers Mr. Marcus. Marcus is a featured performer in over a thousand pornos, including Phat Azz White Girls 11 and Black Dicks in White Chicks 1-6.

I’m starting to get the feeling that Maverick Entertainment thinks those interested in urban films have brains so small that they’re impressed by titles that end with a ’ rather than ‘ing.’

Ahh fuck it, they’re probably right.

DVD: Barebones.

Get Down On It

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 18:09:03 +0000

Get Down On It
Release Date: 23 October 2001 (USA)
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Simuel Rankins
Writer(s): Simuel Rankins
Staring: Mac Bootsie, Genieve Perrin, Bruce Petty

If I’ve learned anything in the past four or five years of being big on direct-to-video cinema, it’s that the barrel does NOT have a bottom. No matter how many times you scrape that barrel, there’s always going to be another pain-inducing piece of crap waiting to be watched.

And so we get to Get Down On It.

Not only does it have quite the possibly the worst cover art in the history of York Entertainment, but it’s also another a downright putrid movie. Shot on what appears to be an old VHS camcorder, Get Down On It is one of those movies that will make you wish you hadn’t returned Hip Hop 4 Life to the video store.

A pair of unattractive African American women decides that they’re tired of hoochies. They proceed to make a bet as to who will marry first, and then lots and lots of unfunny crap ensues.

God willing, Get Down On It will go out-of-print soon and all the existing copies will break, ensuring that no human being will ever have to see this piece of trash again.

DVD: Barebones.

Get a Clue

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 18:04:09 +0000

Get a Clue
Release Date: 2002
Genre: Comedy | Crime | Family
Director(s): Maggie Greenwald (Songcatcher)
Writer(s): Alana Sanko
Starring: Lindsay Lohan, Bug Hall, Ian Gomez

Get a Clue is a Disney Channel movie starring a pre-fame, post-Parent Trap Lindsay Lohan. It was made for ten year old girls to enjoy, and features a lot of frilly, high-tech gadgets that don’t exist in the real world. Having said that, any expectation for a quality movie went out the door from its opening moments, and all I wanted was something to keep me entertained while completing other work.

This is yet another teenage detective film, with rich New Yorker Lexy Gold (Lohan) investigating the disappearance of her teacher. This was the same teacher that the young journalist recently busted for fooling around with another teacher (in a sideplot that never makes much sense), and since the fashion aficionado knows that there’s more to the story than what is in the papers, she and her friends begin to investigate. The group proceeds to blatantly violate the Fourth Amendment over and over again, all while slowly unraveling the mystery.

All the way up to and including the “Scooby Doo” finale, Get a Clue is a harmless but unimpressive feature that does what most Disney Channel movies do. They provide sufficient entertainment for a young kid, but it’s the kind of material that even a child would find a bit too cheesy at points. Other than that, it’s just so generally formulaic and unsurprising that there’s not much point to watching it.
DVD: There’s a twenty-two minute “Alternate Ending” that places another character in the villain’s spot and changes almost nothing.

Gas

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 17:58:20 +0000

Gas
Release Date: 2004
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Henry Chan
Writer(s): Michael Haran & Mark Swinton
Staring: Flex Alexander, Mike Batayeh, Tyson Beckford

Gas most likely started off as something designed to go theatrical, but those hopes were probably abandoned once no one with actual name value would attach themselves to the project. There’s a reason for that too.

This generic urban comedy with a budget has a pair of estranged brothers teaming up to run their father’s gas station after his death. Since this is an urban comedy, this gas station is full of wacky characters. In order to raise the money for their mother’s life-saving surgery, one of the brothers gets a loan from the local Evil Asian, using the gas station as collateral. And before you can say Electric Boogalou, they’re raising money, all while the Evil Asian sends in his henchman to ruin their plans.

Chances are that if you’re reading this site, Gas won’t appeal to you. It’s made for the same crowds who enjoyed Barbershop and Kingdom Come, both of which Gas draws inspiration from. Even these people will probably find Gas tiresome. It has its moments, although they’re all scattered in-between unfunny jokes that fall within familiar territory.
DVD: Barebones.

Gargoyle: Wings of Darkness

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 17:53:01 +0000

Gargoyle: Wings of Darkness
Release Date: 26 October 2004 (Russia)
Genre: Action | Fantasy | Horror
Director(s): Jay Andrews (aka Jim Wynorsi)
Writer(s): Ion Ionescu, A.G. Lawrence (Snakehead Terror), Bill Monroe, & Jim Wynorski
Starring: Michael Paré, Sandra Hess, Fintan McKeown

When I first saw Gargoyle: Wings of Darkness back when it premiered on Sci-Fi under the simplistic title Gargoyles, I absolutely hated it. Considering it’s a Jim Wynorski movie, that’s a rarity. But for this Relapse, I decided to check it out once again. Upon a second watch, Gargoyle is still bad, but it’s better than I remembered it as being.

After the opening action scene, which has CIA Agents Ty Griffin (Paré) and Jennifer Wells attempting to corral a man who kidnapped an ambassador’s son, we’re introduced to an evil that was thought long dead. As the story goes, a gargoyle terrorized what is now Romania back in the day, but was taken out and slammed into the ground thanks to a trusty crossbow covered with the blood of a holy man. The gargoyle has now left his underground lair, where he’s laid many eggs (or whatever the hell those things were), and is now wrecking havoc on a quaint town. That kidnapper is his first victim, as the guy winds up impaled on a weathervane. We’re then introduced to a series of victims, including a drunken teacher and a local crime guy played magnificently by the great Tim Abell.

What it boils down to is that there’s an evil priest who wants to unleash the gargoyles on the world. Along with a woman searching for her now gargoyle-food archaeologist friend, Griffin and Wells begin to investigate. Only problem here is that while some people love Michael Paré, I’m rather indifferent. He has no real character traits here, and as a result, Paré plays the character straight as straight can be. He’s even boring to look at.

The strengths of Gargoyle: Wings of Darkness extend only to Jim Wynorski and the CGI creature. Wynorski is a fine action director working with a higher than usual budget, and as a result, when he gets to balls out at points. The gargoyle, while still a bit laughable, is better animated than most of what comes out of Nu Image these days. Setting his action scenes almost exclusively at night, Wynorski manages to make a lot of scenes look a lot cooler than they actually are.

Still a movie that will never earn a repeat viewing, but for a creature feature, it’s not too bad.
DVD: No Wynorski commentary track, so it can’t even be recommended with that in mind.

Gang of Roses

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 17:49:04 +0000

Gang of Roses
Release Date: 2003
Genre: Action | Drama | Western
Director: Jean-Claude La Marre (Go For Broke, Sugar Valentine)
Writer: Jean-Claude La Marre (Nora’s Hair Salon, Sugar Valentine)
Starring: Lil’ Kim, Bobby Brown, Mario Van Peebles, Glenn Plummer, LisaRaye, Stacey Dash

“Hey, you! Go make an 1800s western with black, female cowboys avenging something!”
“But there’s no chance that could’ve gone down back then Sir.”
“Hey, screw reality, this is the movies! We’ll cover our asses by making a discrimination joke that stems from them being women, and not black! It’ll be hilarious!”
“Who should we cast?”
“How about Lil’ Kim? Everybody loves Lil’ Kim! And how about the black chick from ‘Clueless?’ She rocked my world on that show!”
“How should we craft the script?”
“Meh, I don’t care. Just make up a lame backstory about them being more capable than Billy the Kid. And while you’re at it, make sure all these black, female cowboys wear plenty of make-up!”
“But doesn’t that skewer reality a bit Sir?”
“Have you not learned nothing from being my assistant?”
“Well, actually Sir, I’m not your assistant. I’m the writer-director you hired.”
“Just go make the God damn movie!”

Had Game Over not already taken the cake three weeks into the year, I’d name Gang of Roses as an early candidate for the worst direct-to-video movie of 2004. Despite the large budget it has to work with, Roses does nothing out of the ordinary besides for bits that anyone can pick up on as being stolen from more successful westerns. In a nutshell, it’s a movie about a bunch of black, female cowboys going against a bunch of evil people who are looking for gold.

Mario Van Peebles (for ten seconds) and crack happy Bobby Brown make appearances, but can’t do shit to save this.

DVD: A trailer and an uninteresting behind the scenes piece.

Game Over

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 17:44:51 +0000

Game Over
Release Date: 4 April 2006 (USA)
Genre: Action | Drama
Director(s): Peter Sullivan
Writer(s): Max Miller
Starring: Andre McCoy, Daz Crawford, La Trice Harper

had a friend over my place when my April screener package from Maverick Entertainment arrived. The first movie to pop out was Tortillas Again? “Wow, this one is going to something,” I said. Mr. Hell was next, and we both shared a few laughs over the back of the box trying to compare the Mr. Hell character to past slasher icons. Last to come out was … Game Over.

Fearing that I would experience projectile vomiting for the first time in my life if I continued to stare at the title, I knew I needed to get it away from me as soon as possible. So naturally, I threw it across the room. My friend was flabbergasted, to say the least, at my reaction. Once I explained to her the experience that I had with the last movie to be named Game Over, she held me close and consoled me until the sick feeling in my stomach subsided.

After a month of preparing myself, I picked up Game Over off my floor. After watching Tortillas Again? I felt like I was prepared for anything Maverick Entertainment could throw my way.

Surprisingly enough, Game Over is absolutely nothing like the Yasmine Bleeth-blowfest (in more ways than one) that was Game Over. Game Over Version 2.0 actually has a relatively unique plot to it that, despite a low budget, causes it to come off a lot better than the various competitive fighting films of the 90s. While research will probably reveal that Game Over rips its plot off some Japanese movie, I’m going to stay optimistic and assume for the sake of this review that I’m seeing something new.

Andre “Chyna” McCoy (previously seen as the highlight of Random Acts of Violence) stars in Game Over as ex-con Victor Knox. His criminal history prevents him from getting the job that he so desperately needs to keep his parole officer from sending him back to jail. Since Victor is known to be a tough streetfighter, a friend lets him on the details of an innovative competition with a prize of $100,000 that is seeking participants. As Victor comes to learn, at anytime during the course of his daily life, he’ll be approached to fight. There are hidden cameras everywhere, and the fights are broadcast to those anonymous bloodthirsty millionaires who filled the seats in Bloodsport and all its various knockoffs. Victor doesn’t have a huge problem winning the fights. The seemingly never-ending competition, however, has negative effects on his attempts to form a relationship with his young son and his attempts to go the straight and narrow route in his new job driving around a rich young woman named Violet.

Even though it all sort of comes together in the end, Game Over’s biggest flaw is that it tries to accomplish so much. There are basically four parts to Game Over; Victor’s participation in the contest, his burgeoning relationship with Violet, his shady parole officer, and his attempts to get to know his son. Coming in at about eighty minutes, Game Over tries to tackle a tad bit too much. Aside from that, there are the usual logical fallacies that indicate the script could’ve used some tinkering.

When it comes down to it, though, Game Over is an impressive effort. Andre “Chyna” McCoy isn’t the greatest actor around, but he’s got something that most actors at the low budget level don’t; screen presence. The fights that McCoy gets involved in are far from spectacular. There’s a variety to them that allows them to still be fun. Plus, since there aren’t a ton of them, it keeps them feeling fresh.

An entertaining movie that, while lacking in common sense, makes up for it in energy and wise casting decisions.

DVD: Barebones.

Game Over

ginger — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 17:39:06 +0000

Game Over
Release Date: 2003
Genre: Sci-Fi
Director: Jason Bourque and other idiots
Writer: Keith Shaw (upcoming Sea Ghost and Deep Evil)
Starring: Yasmine Bleeth, Walter Koenig, Michael Buffer, Mike Ditka

Let me first say that at the time of this review, I made an attempt to get in contact with the director and/or producer of this film. I don’t know if they decided not to return my phone call, knowing what was coming to them, or if the secretary for their production company simply didn’t relay the message. As a result, I can’t say for sure that the information is absolutely true.

What a movie.

No, this is not a redux of Lucky.

GAME OVER SUCKS.

From what I can piece together, a bunch of idiots back in 1996 decided to design a video game revolving around Yasmine “Cocaine rocks!” Bleeth and Walter “I must be wearing lipstick and a pound of make-up” Koenig, likely to be released on the heavily hyped Saturn system. For whatever reason, it appears that they filmed over an hour of mind-numbingly poor video game material starring her and other jackasses, only to have the project barely make a blip on the radar. Seven years later the footage was sold to a bunch of damn Canadians, who produced some new wraparound footage in order to make a crappy virtual reality film that is now being marketed in the states as Game Over.

At first, this horrible film seems like it won’t be too bad. Set in the future (a computer monitor reveals it to be JULY OF 2004), a computer hacker who doesn’t like the Internet Police (or something) named Steve Hunter is quite charismatic.

There, right at that point, the whole thing ups the dose of stupidity ten fold. A bunch of evil people put Steve into the machine, which has killed people due to the heavy anxiety the game creates. With the video game being shot in first person, it was relatively easy for them to now splice the footage together. But problem is, it looks ridiculous. While the new shots directed by poor Jason Bourque aren’t anything to praise, they’re at least worthy of film. The game footage, which takes up the core majority of the film, looks terrible on so many levels. Big, fake looking guns shoot the enemies, and then a big fireball erupts around them, like, you guessed it, in a cheap video game.

Shockingly, this seems to have been a high concept video game for the time. Yasmine Bleeth, Walter Koenig, Michael Buffer, and Mike Ditka all sold their souls for the almighty dollar.

It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. It sucks.

DVD: Standard… Don’t rent it, buy it, or even skim its synopsis at the video store. Hell, take the actual movie and hide it somewhere, like say, behind the box of Lawnmower Man 2. You’ll be doing the entire world a favor..