Centipede Release Date: 2004 Genre: Action | Adventure | Horror Director(s): Gregory Gieras (Dark Asylum, The Prince and the Surfer) Writer(s): Gregory Gieras (Dark Asylum) Staring: Larry Casey, Margaret Cash and Trevor Murphy While it seems like every single creature feature has its premiere on the Sci-Fi Channel, that’s not always the case. Sci-Fi, believe […]

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Centipede
Release Date: 2004
Genre: Action | Adventure | Horror
Director(s): Gregory Gieras (Dark Asylum, The Prince and the Surfer)
Writer(s): Gregory Gieras (Dark Asylum)
Staring: Larry Casey, Margaret Cash and Trevor Murphy

While it seems like every single creature feature has its premiere on the Sci-Fi Channel, that’s not always the case. Sci-Fi, believe it or not, has some standards. Very weak standards, but it’s true. Features like Vicious and Creepies don’t get premiered on the channel because they were made on the cheap. Vicious in particular had some of the most horrendous CGI-work in the history of cinema. While Centipede is definitely a more upscale production than those two, its quality is still down near the bottom. Saying all that, it wouldn’t surprise me if Centipede was the cheapest creature feature to run on Sci-Fi.

Since his friend doesn’t want to have his bachelor party at a strip club, Jake comes up with an innovative idea. Since he knows that his friend’s stuck-up and rich fiancé will try to separate him from his friends post-marriage, he decides to take his friends on one last hurrah; an underground exploration in a nearly uncharted, three-mile deep cave in India. Rest assured that’s the first (and last) time you’ll see that bachelor party idea used, although I get the feeling that I’ll be pitching it in the future just to see the looks on my friend’s faces.

You know how the rest goes. The group arrives to the cave, and while they chat it up, we learn that there’s a toxic waste scandal unfolding. So yeah, here comes the gigantic centipedes, and here comes the formula.

Although I’ll give the filmmakers credit for refraining from CGI, I never really cared about what was happening. Even in the generic Nu Image films where the characters are cardboard cutouts, I find myself kind of caring about certain characters. In Centipede, though, I was just bored. Aside from a few chase sequences and an explosion-filled ending, the film lacked energy at every turn.

It’s a shame this didn’t turn out well, as I really did enjoy director Gieras’ last effort Dark Asylum.

DVD: Barebones.

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Centipede, 3.0 out of 10 based on 1 rating

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