Axe Release Date: 2006 Genre: Action | Horror | Thriller Director(s): Ron Wolotzky Writer(s): Dred Ross & Eyal Sher Starring: Jason London, Darlena Tejeiro, Andrea Bogart Okay, let’s go over the MTI-Horror rule once again. If MTI Home Video releases a horror movie that is not put out through the company’s Redrum subsidiary, the chances […]

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Axe
Release Date: 2006
Genre: Action | Horror | Thriller
Director(s): Ron Wolotzky
Writer(s): Dred Ross & Eyal Sher
Starring: Jason London, Darlena Tejeiro, Andrea Bogart

Okay, let’s go over the MTI-Horror rule once again.

If MTI Home Video releases a horror movie that is not put out through the company’s Redrum subsidiary, the chances of it being awful increase ten-fold.

In the future, I should probably place an asterisk next to the word ‘horror’ and clarify that actual horror and something marketed as horror are one in the same. Axe may have three attractive people, a psycho, and an axe on its boxart, but it is not really a horror film. Aside from being a gigantic mess, it’s not really much of anything.

Axe, formerly known as Greed, is a movie about a pair of rock climbing hotties who accidentally steal a large sum of money and incur the wrath of the motorcycle riding baddies they ripped off. Sounds like enough material to fill a ninety-page script, right? Obviously you’re not writers Dred Ross and Eyal Sher, because there’s more to Axe. There is also small town corruption and a “Don’t trust anybody no matter how nonsensical their motives may be” plotline as well.

Okay, that’s gotta be it. There’s only ninety-two minutes for all this to fit in people! But no, that’s not the case. Axe is also about an escaped lunatic who kills his victims with (brace yourselves) an axe. That lunatic, by the way, actually rides an ATV in one scene. He is quite possibly the poorest villain I’ve seen since the Witchcraft marathon. This guy is a shining example of why antagonists in slasher films wear masks. Not because he’s ugly, but because the guy playing him fails in every single way possible to emote his craziness.

The “star” of the film, Jason London, is only on screen for ten or fifteen minutes. To say London’s career has taken a much-deserver downward spiral after Dazed & Confused would be an understatement. Like just about every cast member here, he looks embarrassingly unrehearsed.

To be completely honest, there’s not a single good thing that I can say about Axe. What the hell was director Ron Wolotzky thinking during the course of Axe’s production? What’s even worse is that the commentary track shows him to be quite proud of the way the movie turned out.

The fact that Axe is a colossal failure is the sole reason for the movie’s rating. It is so stupid that it actually delivered a great time. There’s no other reason to subject yourself to such incompetence other than for the sake of generating pure laughter.
DVD: A commentary track with director Ron Wolotzky that, aside from details on a couple location problems, offers no insight into anything interesting.

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Axe, 4.0 out of 10 based on 1 rating

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